my heart is full.

my heart is full of a lot of things lately. my heart is thankful. my heart is fearful. my heart is blessed. i go thru ups and downs just like every other person. i'm happy to say that i'm happy. simply happy. my days have been full of laughter. full of trucks, toys, books, puzzles. park visits. lately my mind has been full of thoughts of our future. it is human nature to think about our future. what does it hold for ryon and me? we have been talking a lot lately about buying some land. it's something we are really passionate about and just have to find the right time and the right place. we want a place to take our boys. whenever we want. we want to own some of God's country. so we are keeping our eyes and ears open. this excites me. as a family, this is what we love. we love the ranger, the outdoors, the views. the simplicity. 

we've also been talking about schools. i wish it was so easy. good schools are hard to come by around here and the good ones take a lot of money. like our college fund will go to k-12 instead. this is hard to swallow. hard to believe we live in a country that our tax dollars paying for public schools goes "wasted" because it's simply not "good enough" for our kids. what is good enough? as a parent, we have lots of decisions to make for our future. this makes my mind full. and my heart weary. we all want the best for our kids. it's just figuring out when, where, and can we possibly get them in?! do we move? do we stay? do we just suck it up and pay the money? if we are willing, will there even be a spot? two spots for both boys? will they test into the GT public elementary? will their name get drawn for a spot at a magnet school?

my heart is also fearful. fearful that these little moments are passing me by. can i already be thinking about school? let's go play. let's go dig. let's go jump. that's all i want to do with my boys. they are young. but someday...very soon actually... i won't get to spend my days with them. they will be in a teacher's presence instead. i don't like thinking about it.

my heart is proud. ryon is amazing. he delivered 18 machines in january. his goal for the entire quarter was 19. my heart is proud :)

today was a great day. we ate breakfast on the couch together which sutton played. we watched shrek. we made valentines. we took a wagon ride to the park. we ate sausage and cheese together. we read the truck book. we made sutton giggle. there is no greater joy.