Mommy time

So what about me? I truly want this blog to be my thoughts for my boys someday. Obviously that means I have to print it! Which I have every intention of doing. But sometimes I get in the 'write about the events of our lives' and the boys and not always about what's going on with me. Which I don't mind sharing bc for one: I know the ten people that read this, 2: I want my boys to know me and what's going on with me in my life at certain times. So what about me? I'd like to say I'm pretty happy these days. Stressed tired, overwhelmed at times but overall I'm happy. I love spending my days with my boys and teaching and learning alongside them. I hate yelling at mason and somedays I feel like its all I do, and I have to stop myself to figure out what he's doing that us making me so angry and how to change it....quickly! Although I'm happy with life in general, I'm not happy with my body, at all. Lets see I was pregnant from April 2010 to may 2012 with about 8 months in between. That's a long ass time! No other way to put it :) my clothes are awful, they look awful they feel awful...ugh! I'm so glad I get away with work out clothes most days since I spend my days with the boys and every stay at home mom knows its completely stupid to put on a real shirt when you are around your kids; maybe girls are different but I always have dirt, food, snot, snack, something all over me. But that's me; it's who I am these days and soon it will pass and ill miss my boys so much when they are in school everyday. However I just realized the last shower I took was Thursday right before I picked up the boys.... It's Saturday night! Lordy. On my defense Ryon left Friday morning, so I haven't really had the time or desire :) it's on the agenda for tonight though! Ok thoughts: junior league is so good. I'm very thankful for the opportunity to teach these women about the league and be the first person they have a relationship with in the league. It's super busy though... I'm kind of ready for an easier placement. I love it though. It's becoming who I am and what I enjoy the most. I'm still doing a Thursday bible study. The book about giving up your fears; I'm so much more relaxed when it comes to all the what ifs in life... Between the book and going to Justin's sisters funeral, Jennie, I'm at peace. It's very weird. I'm just totally at peace with what life is going to throw at me. I think I'm at peace bc my mason asks to pray of we forget, he wants to hold our hands when we pray at night...he knows god. He asks to pray for certain things: granted we pray for tractors and Bradley but I love it. That's my job here, for my children to know God and for my husband to know how much I love him. The second is harder some days.... I'm not being a good wife in showing Ryon how much I love and appreciate him. I'm working on it. But back to my bible study; I like it but I still don't feel like I'm really connecting to the women very well...so I'll see what happens. I actually have skipped the last two weeks bc I've just had other things ice wanted to do. Is making good couple friends when you have kids just really hard? I still feel like it is. Or maybe it's just us. Or maybe it's midland. I'm not sure, I'm ready to have great girl friends that the husbands also get along well... But when your kids are in bed by 8 and everyone leaves every weekend it's a bit hard....so those are my thoughts for the evening... Off to shower :) ha.